The magic of making up

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momuZzzzziiiiiip…CRASH!…and then the shattering sound of glass as Deidre hurls Al’s Playstation 3 from the 2nd story apartment window…followed by a shrill and sobbing “GET OUT!…GET OUT!…GET OooooUT!”

See, IT WAS THE LAST STRAW! Even though Al loved Deidre with all his heart…he had lied so often… had ignored Deidre so much that she just reached her boiling point that hot, muggy summer afternoon.

And Al did get out. Deidre was serious. She had had enough of Al’s ways. See, Al was a good guy…a great guy even…he cared deeply and loved Deidre…and Deidre knew it too…but that wasn’t her problem. She was sick of feeling unappreciated…and Al just didn’t know what would make her happy anymore. He didn’t know how to wipe the slate clean…or start over…

And this WAS the end of Deidre and Al…forever…As it is the end of so many relationships…

What if it didn’t have to be?

What if you could recapture your ex lovers mind, heart and soul?…Wipe the slate clean? Turn back time? Even if you feel right now that your situation is too far gone…too screwed up …or just plain too darn complicated?

I am going to show you right in this letter the first thing Al SHOULD have done…first may I say?…

I know if you are here right now you are probably in a great deal of heart ache and pain. I understand…and I have been there too…and I am not going to belabor on and on about the pain you feel…because I know that you know it all too well…

You already know how hard it is to just even wake up and roll out of bed in the morning. You leave your radio off on your way to work because every song is a painful reminder of him. You can’t even bear to eat at the same restaurants you took her to.  And if that isn’t bad enough, you have to cope with the loss of friends and family that are on “their side”.

If you are in pain and confused?

Here’s some good news

Did you know that most relationships CAN be salvaged? You may find it difficult to believe that almost every break up for whatever reason…infidelity, plain old lost passion, loss of interest, a stolen heart and worse…even the worst situations you can imagine…like men serving prison sentences have salvaged their relationships. Yes, even Ex-cons have got back together with girlfriends and wives after being away for years!

There is hope…

Now I can almost see you shaking your head in disbelief…

And it’s okay…let me ask?

Don’t you know couples that have gotten back together? A girl that has taken a guy back?…or vice versa?

I bet you do…and here’s the strange real clincher…

Do you remember why they broke up in the first place? I bet you know at least one guy or gal that took their lover back after an affair…or unfaithfulness…or worse even?

Think about it for a sec…

Sure! And I bet you know of…or have heard of at least one girl that has taken a guy back that REALLY should not have…you know the ones I am talking about…(and I know this is kind of dark)… the girls or guys that are in verbally or physically abusive relationships.

Now, that is some really dark stuff and I am not recommending to anyone to take someone back if the relationship was abusive…I am using it as a point that almost NO SITUATION is unsalvageable…

“Couples reunite every day REGARDLESS of the situation!”

Seriously, Doesn’t that make sense? That if most of us can think of couples that have gotten back together…under even some horrible circumstances…that there could be some hidden recipe, or secret even, to reigniting passion and recapturing lost love?

Now…I am not saying they were holding some “secret love spell” book and doing weird chants…not at all…at the same time somehow, by MOSTLY accident they said and did the RIGHT THINGS at the RIGHT TIME…and won back the heart of their lover…or at least created the circumstances where their ex gave them a second chance.

Allow me to repeat…they did this by mostly ACCIDENT!

Imagine…

What if? What they said…and what they did…could be “bottled” so to speak? And then you could “unbottle” it and put it to use? To erase old hurts…to reignite passion again…to turn back to a time when your relationship was fresh, new and exciting.

Yes…A Magic Love Recipe…in a sense…

You see there IS a “recipe for love” as well as a recipe for winning back and keeping some ones interest, desire, passion, heart and love…

What they did by “accident” can be repeated over and over on PURPOSE!

And you know what?

If I were you…I would be somewhat skeptical right now…that’s totally fine! I am going to show you some concrete proof. Just bear with me okay?

Do you have these symptoms?

-Leaving the radio off because every song makes you cry

-Loss of appetite

-Binge eating for comfort

-Calling your ex several times a day

-Text messaging and emailing constantly (Text Message Terrorism)

-Constantly checking your email and voice mail to see if he/she called

-Not going out because you are afraid to miss a call

-Thinking non-stop about why they REALLY left you

-Feeling massively depressed

-Feeling urges to spy on them

-Endlessly rehearsing what you should have said

-Endlessly rehearsing what you will say if you bump into them

…and when you do get a hold of them, it usually turns ugly because without a clear plan of what you are supposed to do…what happens? P-A-N-I-C…defensiveness…arguments…and then it gets really nasty.

Do you make these mistakes with your ex?

-We try to convince them we are the love of their life

-We will apologize profusely for everything

-Promise to change for good this time

-Try to get them to see that it wasn’t really our fault

-Even beg with them to take us back

…and of course with every word we utter, regardless of our intention, the more and more defensive, angry and distant they become.

Please know…this is not your fault! You weren’t taught this in school. You probably weren’t taught this by your parents…and there is no “get your ex back” night school…

Yeah?

And it is really a shame too because what could be more important than love? ..Cars?…Money?…Clothes?…ALGEBRA?

So why? Are there all kinds of books, magazines and help on fixing a car, managing money and all the latest fashions, yet very little USEFUL information on how to fix a broken relationship…manage your emotions or getting the love of your life back?

Crazy huh?

And now as you will soon see…all that has changed.

TO GO AND GET A LOT MORE HELP..

PLEASE CLICK ON THE BOOK

momu

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Tips To Getting Your Ex Back

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Getting your ex back dominates the thoughts of many a man and woman.  Perhaps you were the one to finish the relationship thinking that life was passing you by.  Having been in the nightmare that is the singles world, you have decided that your ex was fantastic and now you need to know how to get them back. Or maybe you were the one who was dumped but having had time to pull yourself together you are determined to teach your former partner the error of their ways.

Before you consider how to get your ex back in your life, you should be 100% sure that this is the outcome that you want.  You are going to spend a lot of time and energy achieving this wish but it will be a waste of everyone’s time if you are doing it solely for revenge.  This applies to those people that have been dumped so start dreaming of revenge and how it will make them feel better.   One quote that I believe in is revenge is a dish best served cold.  What it means is that you have to let your emotions, primarily your anger, cool off before taking any action.  What I believe the quote is trying to achieve is that by the time you have cooled down, you will forget about your ex and be putting your energies into meeting someone new.

But for those of us who have decided that our ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend was the ONE, here are some tips to try to getting your ex back.

1) Do not appear needy.  Desperation is never an attractive quality.  You will be far more successful in attracting your ex mate if you appear to be living your life to the full.  Don’t call or make contact with them. You will have sufficient mutual friends to be able to appear to be in the same location as your ex by accident.

2) Do not stalk your ex – again this is not the way forward. You want them to come back to you not have them report you to the police for stalking.

3) Always look your best.  Wear their favorite clothes, hairstyle, makeup etc.  Remember all those little details that used to drive them wild and use them to your advantage.

4) Do not try and make your ex jealous by dating someone else.  This is juvenile behaviour. There is never an excuse for using another person in this way.

5) Try being direct.  Men and women often have communication issues hence the best selling books such as “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus” etc.  So sometimes the best way to getting your ex back is just to tell them how you feel.  Apart from a little pride, what do you have to lose?

If you are certain that getting your ex back in your life will make you happy, you need to pull out all the stops!

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Great Relationship Advice For Men

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Men often wonder if they are speaking the same language as women because they can land in hot water very quickly.  They look for relationship advice for men in order to avoid these situations but most relationship advice is written by women for other women.

There are some basic rules that men need to understand in order to increase their success rate with women.

The first one is you need to worry when your woman gives you the silent treatment.  Most men go silent because they have nothing left to say but when a woman goes silent, it is generally a bit hint that you have upset her. Whilst you may think that silence is golden, women use not talking as a punishment. So if your lady friend has a silent day, think back over your actions and try to determine what you have done to upset her.

Secondly, PMT is not always the reason for a woman being in a bad mood. Sometimes they are upset and hurt over something and it has nothing to do with when their period is due. If you constantly blame PMT, you will probably find yourself searching the lonely hearts columns in the near future.

Women like to talk about their problems but this doesn’t mean that they want you to fix everything.  Most females are quite capable of looking after themselves and they just want to let off steam. God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason.  Just in case, it was so you could listen to what your partner is saying before you jump in with the solution.  Do yourself a favor and believe that silence in this instance goes a long way.

When looking for relationship advice for men, they often look in the wrong places.  It is not ideal to ask your partners father what her problem is.  Firstly he is unlikely to understand her any more than you do but being the apple of his eye, he will wonder what you have done to upset her.

It helps to remember that your female partner and an elephant have something in common – their memory. Your partner will never forget anything so don’t be surprised if she has a list a mile long of all the things you did wrong in the last six months.

Try talking to your partner. Tell her often how much you love and appreciate her and cuddle her without always expecting it to lead to sex.  Like people of both sexes, women like to be held and appreciated without feeling they have to give you something in return.

Also if you are worried about something speak to your partner.  Whilst she may be female, she is not helpless and two heads are often better than one at solving a problem.  In addition, if she knows what is bothering you she is less likely to become emotionally distant having decided that you must be having an affair or are planning to leave her.

Life long partnerships take work on both sides but be careful what sources you use as relationship advice for men.

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The Best Relationship Quotes I Know

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I love reading relationship quotes and today I thought I would share a couple of my favorite ones with you. Where possible, proper credit has been given to the person who wrote or spoke the original quote. However in some cases that may not have been possible.

You know love funny quotes as I believe humour is a key ingredient in a great relationship. Some of the funny ones I like are:

“What can you say to a man who has just had sex?  Anything you like as he is asleep”.

Or for those male readers – “what is the difference between a terrorist and a woman with PMS?” “You can negotiate with a terrorist!”

Joking aside, this quote credited to Leo Buscaglia should be in all couple’s homes.

“Too often we under estimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around”.

As most of us know it is the little things in a relationship that can cause it to fail or blossom. It is easy to blame the other person in our relationship for our dissatisfaction but as Martha Washington said “I have learned from experience that a greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances.”

Some relationship quotations are beautiful and sad at the same time.  Such as the one from William Somerset Maugham (an English Writer) on unrequited love being “The love that lasts the longest is the love that is never returned.”

While I don’t think Colin Powell was talking about relationships when he said “None of us can change our yesterdays, but we can all change our tomorrows”, it is one that we could all do with remembering. Too often we waste time and energy holding grudges against our partners for something they did in the past. It is too late to change it now so let it go once and for all. So long as it isn’t a pattern of repeated behaviour it doesn’t do anyone any good to remember it.

“Alone we can do so little, together we can do so much ” Helen Keller. This lady was my idol when I was growing up. Despite being born blind and mute she achieved so much more than the rest of us often do. I believe that being part of a couple and then a family gives us the chance to be so much more. We need to appreciate the gifts we have. Our relationships would be a lot happier if we said thank you and I love you just a little more often.

As Mother Theresa is quoted as saying “There is more hunger for love and appreciation in the world today than for bread”.  Make sure your loved one knows how much you love and appreciate them today, to avoid a day when you wished you had listened to the relationship quotes.

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How To Save A Relationship – Take Baby Steps

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Well the good news is that if both of you are agreeable, the actual process of how to save a relationship is fairly easy.  If both of you still want to be life partners then you know that you love each other; but for some reason are finding it hard to communicate right now.

Life gets in the way of relationships. There is no two ways around that. Unfortunately we are all guilty of taking our loved ones for granted. We can spend time sorting out our kids problems, our friends problems perhaps even those of our work colleagues only to arrive home in a heap exhausted. We often assume that our partner can read our mind and know that we love and care about them.

But no matter how secure someone is, if they constantly feel or are made feel that they belong at the bottom of a very long list of priorities, they may leave. Feelings of resentment can grow over time and become rather like a snowball – small to start but soon takes on huge proportions.

The first step would be to arrange a night where both of you are free to concentrate 100% on your relationship. Get a sitter for the kids and head out somewhere for the evening. If you pick a public place, you are less likely to let your resentments boil over into an argument.

Agree that both of you want this relationship to work and reassure each other that you are committed to your partnership.  Arrange a series of date nights – these nights are for you two as a couple. You could each write out a list of what you would like to try in the relationship be it a night at the Opera or a particular technique in the bedroom. Then take turns trying to fulfil the other person’s wishes.

In addition to the lists of treats you would like, you also should make a list of all that you enjoy about the relationship and then a list of the problem areas as you each see them.

Spending time together away from the hassles of real life will help you to rediscover the magic that brought you together. Sharing the above lists will help you to realise what you have and what you need to work on.

Now it could be easy for one party to become offended at what is written down. You both need to know that this exercise has been done solely to increase the satisfaction level in your relationship not to knock the other person’s confidence or blame them for the problems. Try not to become defensive but listen to both the good parts and the bad. Try not to go to bed on an argument as unresolved conflict can cause more resentment. Showing love and appreciation goes a long way believe me.

By encouraging open communication and time for each other you should find that your commitment to each other becomes stronger and your friends will soon be asking you for advice on how to save a relationship.

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Still In Love With My Ex Girlfriend – How To Get Her Back

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Many men tell me ‘I’m still in love with my ex girlfriend.’ They want to know if there’s anything they can do to get her back. The very first question to ask men who think they want their ex back is to ask what they’ve already tried.

A man who is serious about getting his ex girlfriend back will usually say he’s repeatedly tried to tell her how much he loves her and needs her. He’s reassured her that he’ll change and the relationship will be different if she gives him a second chance.  This kind of begging and pleading simply shows a woman that you’re desperate and often drives them even further away.

Some men will try the opposite tactic to pleading and they’ll turn to bribery. Buying her expensive gifts or taking her to fancy restaurants in an attempt to impress her won’t work either. She may accept your tokens, but bribery isn’t the way to win back love.

The vast majority of women want to be in a relationship with a man who will listen to what she has to say. Even if she’s just making small talk, it’s important to her that she’s heard. This doesn’t mean you have to agree with everything she says. You just need to listen.

When asked if they’re willing to listen to their ex girlfriends, men who are trying hard to get back their ex often say ‘I’ve tried to listen, but she doesn’t listen to a word I say.’ Sometimes when men think they’re listening, what they’re really doing is hearing the problem and then immediately talking back to offer a solution to fix whatever problem his girlfriend is having. He believes because she doesn’t hear a word he says that she’s not listening.

However, only hearing the parts of the conversation you think you can help her with and then trying to make her listen to you first is not the same as YOU listening to your girlfriend’s needs. Women appreciate men who listen to them. Unfortunately, men communicate in slightly different ways, which could probably have been a contributing factor to your break up in the first place.

If you’re still thinking ‘I’m still in love with my ex-girlfriend and want to get her back’, then practice listening. Ask her a question and then listen to what she says intently. Make a comment about her response or ask another question relating to her response, but don’t try to fix it or dismiss it as unimportant. Simply listen to her.

Women assume that a man who listens to her really cares. It tells you that you understand and that you’re really interested. The next time you receive an opportunity to get together with your ex, take some time to establish eye contact and really listen intently to what she says.

At first, you might find your ex-girlfriend is a little confused or guarded about your sudden change, but when she realizes that you are interested in what she’s saying she’ll begin to relax and realize that you do care. She’ll immediately begin wondering why her feelings for you went away and they should come rushing back when she understands that you really do still love your ex and really do want her back.

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How To Win Love Back

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It’s easy to fall into routines and habits in relationships where we all end up taking what we have for granted. We simply expect the other person to be there until one day the relationship comes crumbling down around you. Fortunately learning how to win love back is easier than most people believe.

The problem with most ‘how to win love back’ tactics is that they don’t take into consideration the primary differences between the way men and women think. Women will try very hard to make their man understand how much they love him and need him, while men view actions as speaking louder than any words you can say.

If you’re serious about learning how to win love back, then you’ll need to spend a bit of time removing the words from your relationship’s memories and taking a look at what your actions were saying.

Most women can think of times when they were trying hard to tell their man that they love him and want him to stay. You know the words you said, but what did your actions say? To a man, you would have been showing him how upset you were and how hurt you were. In his mind, he would have been thinking that he’s the cause of all your misery, so you’d be better off if he just broke up with you.  This means all your reassurances of how much you love him actually pushed him away!

Think about all the times where you both argued and got angry. Your words might have been trying to make him see reason and understand your point of view, but your actions were telling him something very different. Your man wouldn’t have heard the words you shouted at him. He would only have seen a very unhappy woman who really wasn’t happy with the man before her. His mind would instantly have thought he was the cause of your misery and he’s believe it’s easier to break up with you rather than keep making you so unhappy. The same thing is true if you give him the silent treatment.

When you’re learning how to win back love, you have to realize that your actions will speak far louder than any words you can say. Your partner wants you to be happy. He also wants to believe you’re happy when you’re spending time with him. The best possible way to show him that he’s the right man for you is to go out and work on your own self-confidence levels.

When you feel happy within yourself and you’re confident and brimming with life, you’re irresistible to the man who fell in love with you. After all, when the relationship was still new and exciting, you were both bubbly and happy and pleased to spend time with each other. This is the version of you your partner fell in love with.

Spend some time working on things that make you happy. Hang out with friends or take a walk to clear your unhappy thoughts. Watch a fun movie and then suggest that you catch up with your man over a friendly cup of coffee. Your actions will show that you’re a more pleasant person to be with and his feelings will start to re-kindle as though by magic.

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Signs Your Ex Wants You Back

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Many people find that once the relationship has broken up, there may still be some signs that your ex wants you back.  Sometimes people end relationships for the wrong reasons. This could be because of an argument that led to them saying something they didn’t really mean, or it could be because they ended up taking the relationship for granted.

If your relationship has ended and you’re wondering if those signals you’re receiving are signs your ex wants you back, then there are some things you should think about. There are some men who only want to keep in touch so they can get what they need from you when they want it. However, there are some specific signs that your ex wants you back instead of just wanting to get what he can get.

It’s important that you distinguish between real signs and things you hope to see. Some women love their partners so much their imagination helps them to visualize their partner making positive signals to get them back. While it’s easy to see the positive in anything he does when you’re wanting him back, you must remember that some signals will be him just trying to get whatever he can get from you, while there will be definite clear signals that tell you he really wants to fix the relationship and start over.

Signs Your Ex Wants You Back

Perhaps the biggest sign your ex wants you back is when he begins trying to communicate with you frequently. You start to notice you’re getting phone calls or text messages and emails more regularly and he seems to want to just keep in touch. This is often a good sign that he wants to test the waters to see if you’re still angry or if you’re willing to talk.

If you notice during conversations with him that he keeps telling you about things he’s doing that are new or different, these could be signs that he’s trying to impress you by improving himself. In his mind, he’d be thinking he wasn’t good enough to make the relationship work last time, so working to find ways to impress you, such as joining a gym or taking self-help classes or aiming at a new promotion at work or trying to earn more money could be ways for him to try and prove to you that he’s a better catch now.

Another way to recognize signs your ex wants you back could be listening carefully to the questions he asks you when you catch up again. If he seems to be very interested in what you’re doing and who you spend your time with, then he still has some interest in you. He’s testing the waters to be sure you don’t have a new guy on the scene.

The biggest possible signs your ex wants you back are unmistakable, yet many women miss them! When he says to you ‘I miss you and I want you back’, this is an absolutely certain sign he really wants to come back. It’s surprising how many men tell their ex-girlfriends this, yet the emotionally worried woman simply doesn’t hear it – or worse, she doesn’t believe it. She thinks it’s a trick or that there’s a catch.

The truth is, if he looks you in the eye and tells you he wants to come back, then don’t quiz him or accuse him or be doubtful about his signs. Smile. Be the happy, confident person he fell in love with and that he enjoys spending time with. After all, it’s the positive signs your ex wants you back that you should be looking for.

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Relationship Rescue

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Many people begin searching for relationship rescue tactics to try and bring back the spark they once had with a partner when the magic begins to fade. Over time, most relationships grow and change from the loving, romantic bond into a steady routine of daily rituals and habits. In some cases, those habits can make one or both people in the relationship feel as though they’re being taken for granted.

Some people may find that they’re arguing more often than they’re enjoying each other. Others may find that there’s nothing left to say to each other or they simply fall into a daily pattern where everything else seems more important than the relationship.

Your relationship doesn’t have to be this way.

Often the first avenue many people try in order to re-kindle a relationship is to try and bring back some of the romance. Intimate dinners and provocative lingerie are nice physical attempts at bringing you closer again, but they don’t address on the inner, emotional reasons why the relationship may be strained. On the other hand, endlessly talking about your relationship rescue plans and tactics could potentially drive a wedge between you and strain the relationship even further.

There are plenty of relationship rescue tactics you can use to bring that loving spark back into your relationships. Here are some relationship rescue suggestions you can try to help get you back on the right track.

1.    Appreciation

When the initial heady, romantic stage of any relationship begins to settle into a comfortable partnership, many people lose sight of the things they originally appreciated in their partner. They begin to focus on the things that irritate them or annoy them or make them mad.

Unfortunately, focusing on all the negative aspects of your partner can often bring about a feeling of resentment, which can lead to arguments and eventually the destruction of the relationship.

It’s important to try and find things in your partner that you appreciate. You might appreciate their kindness or their sense of humor or their intelligence or whatever attribute attracted you to them in the first place.

2.    Awareness

Live each day of your relationship as though it was the last day you have with your partner. Accidents happen when we least expect them. While this doesn’t mean it’s going to happen to you, consider how you’d feel if something did happen and today really was the final day you had together.

What would you regret most? What would you wish you’d said or done or changed if you never had the opportunity to do them again?

Your answers to those questions should be the very same things you need to be doing with your partner each and every day. When you live each day as though it was your last, the romance will return almost immediately.

3.    Communication

Your partner can’t read your mind. Sitting in silence letting a problem brew until you’re at bursting point won’t make your partner see problems any more clearly and it can compound the negative emotions within you.

It’s important to communicate with your partner about your expectations, your needs, your goals and ambitions, your disappointment and anger. Communication is about letting the other person know what you’re feeling in a clear, non-blaming manner so that you can both be sure you’re on the same page.

Relationship rescue is all about finding ways to be sure you understand and appreciate the little things you do for each other instead of focusing on the negatives. If you can communicate clearly and find ways to appreciate and support your partner, then your relationship rescue attempts will be rewarded.

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I Miss My Ex – What Should I Do

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Are you thinking ‘I miss my ex’ after a painful relationship break up? If this sounds like you, then you’re not alone. Missing your ex is a normal part of the grieving process after any break up, but some women’s  longing to see their ex one more time goes much deeper than simply missing the companionship.

In these cases, women can feel as though they have missed out on their chance at true love. If this sounds like you and you find yourself saying ‘I miss my ex’ then there may be some things you can do to win back your relationship.

Even if you think you’ve tried everything you can to get your ex back, perhaps you need to reconsider your tactics, as some of the things you might be doing could potentially be pushing him even further away. Some things women try in order to get their ex to realize how much they miss him can often make him run the other way instead of coming back to you.

These things can include calling him and telling him you miss him and you love him in an upset, miserable tone of voice. To a man, this sounds like desperation from a very unhappy person. Men like to spend time with people who make them feel good. This means they’ll look for women who are happy and confident because they make him feel as though he’s capable of making them happy.

If you’ve ever called your ex and cried about how upset you are now he’s gone, then you might have pushed him even further away. Don’t worry, though. It is possible to fix this kind of mistake by simply not contacting him for a few days to give him plenty of time to miss you. After all, if you’re texting or emailing or calling him all the time, when has he had a chance to miss you yet?

While you’re spending some time away from him, you need to spend some time working on building up your own self-confidence. Give yourself a mini makeover. When women look good, they feel good too. Spend some time doing things that make you feel good. Go out with some girlfriends and do some fun things together.

Building your own self-confidence will help to stop you thinking about the negative, upsetting aspects of telling yourself over and over ‘I miss my ex’. Instead of this, begin thinking about positive things you can do to become the happy, confident woman that your ex fell in love with in the first place.

After all, when you can put yourself back into a positive frame of mind, you’ll be ready to give him a call and suggest you both catch up for a friendly coffee and a chat. This will give you a chance to let him spend some time with the happy, confident version of you that he once loved and was attracted to. If you feel your emotions coming to the surface and you feel like you want to beg or plead with him or if you feel like you’re going to cry, remember that the unhappy you is the one he pulled away from and broke up with.

So if you’re thinking ‘I miss my ex’, take heart. There is still hope you can work on ways to get your ex back.

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